Never Before Posted Referral Pics

The end of October was an anniversary of sorts for us since it was a year ago that we saw our Fi's face for the first time. Here are some of the referral pictures that I never posted because we couldn't until we had brought her home.

The one above was the first picture that I saw of her. It was the day that she was brought to Hannah's Hope around 6 months old. She was so happy in all of the pictures. I cried and cried when I saw her. She was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

Here she is at 7 or 8 months old.

Here she is at 9 months old.

A wonderful family that was picking up their little girl took a picture for us about a month before we traveled to get her. She was about 11 months old.

A year later our little Fi is crazy, cute, and the light of our lives! Can't imagine life without her now.

Fall pics

Pony rides this October was the highlight of T's year. He still talks about it. He was so serious about the whole thing and never smiled once.

Apple picking and the petting zoo.

Aunt Jessa came along too and we all had such a good time.

At the petting zoo. The little goats were so cute.

The End of Chemo

T and his Aunt Jessa right after she had to shave her head for the first time.

As some of you know my little sister has cancer. She had been sick over a year and the doctors could not figure out what she had. She came home for spring break (from college) last March and my parents sent her to another doctor. It ended up that she had cancer and none of the doctors recognized the symptoms until then. Great huh.

So it was a bit of a shock for all of us, but she has been doing great and has really fought hard. And after 6 months of chemo she finally has finished and only has radiation left. The doctors have said that she is doing very well. Most of that is because my mom has been forcing her to eat and everyone has been visiting to cheer her up.

The Kids and the Cancer:
We live in an apartment attached to my parents house. It is the most wonderful living situation. We have gotten to be close to Jessa and the kids have helped raise her spirits. Every day we would go up to her room and sit with her. Most of the time she could only handle a few minutes with them (they are loud and crazy kids), but they loved visiting. T would run up and sit on her bed with her and steal all of her snacks by her bed.

It has been hard though to explain to a toddler why Aunt Jessa is always sick, goes to the doctor all of the time, and doesn't have any hair. They do love her bald head and always want to rub it. They use to get upset if she would put on a wig. One time Jessa wanted to go out with T and my Dad and T told her that she couldn't because she was sick. He also likes to pretend to take medicine just like Aunt Jessa does.

This summer we had all of the family together for the first time in almost a year. My brother Jeff (the one in the front and in the white) works and lives in Tokyo so we don't see him much. My grandparents visited at the same time and of course we had our normal house full. The picture above is our pic when everyone was here.

My parents' house is always full of people coming and going. This summer my youngest brother was of course living at home, as was my cousin Jenny (more like my other sister), and Jessa. It felt like every other week we had someone visiting. My kids love it and since we have our own place separate from my parents' house it doesn't disrupt our little routine too much.

This was our "Support Your Local Cancer Patient" picture. We have have hats or wigs on except Jessa. Even the dog has a scarf on. Jessa has worked hard fighting this cancer and I couldn't be prouder of her. She has remained pretty happy through this whole thing.

Our family picture with everyone. My parents, us four siblings, my husband and kids.

Most people give us an odd look when we say that we co-house with my parents. It is odd for America I suppose, but very common in the rest of the world. Our situation couldn't be better because we have our own 3 bedroom apartment but share resources. We get to have big family dinners and whatever affects one of us affects us all.

My family really is the most amazing group of people. We are all loud and into each others business, but we don't really fight and love being around each other. It is the way families should be and a great place to raise kids. It might not always work out that we get to live this close but for as long as we have it we will enjoy it.

Hair, Hair and More Hair!

As a white mom of an adopted African child I knew that I would have to work hard to get good at doing her hair. I have loved it. I always wished that I had hair like hers. My limp white girl hair can't do anything cool. I still have so much to learn, but in case anyone wants to know here is our hair journey so to speak.

Fi has the most beautiful soft curls ever, but very tight and gets matted in the back. We went to pick her up in Ethiopia when Fi was 11 months old. She had had her head shaved at 6 month old when she had come into the orphanage so her hair was short of short. As soon as we got her to our hotel I parted her hair and put two little clips in it. It was amazing how different she looked and how she looked more like a girl.

Since she hated having her hair even touched, that was the only hair style we did for a while. Every single day though I did her hair. Got it wet first (this is the key to her hair), put conditioner in it, and then combed it out. At first I could only do her hair when she was in the bath and not paying attention. Soon though I discovered her love of Veggie Tales sing-a-longs. She has since learned to sit kind of still while her show was on leaving me a limited amount of time to to her hair. The show gets paused or turned off if she fusses or moves too much. Doing something to her hair everyday also helps her get use to it.

Most of her styles to start with were only on the top of her head because the rest of it is too short. The most common were two puffs onto of her head (parted down the middle and from ear to ear). My other favorite for a while was four puffs that connected into another set of four puffs (below).

Sometimes the back would be free or sometimes it would also be in puffs. I also braid each little puff before I connect it to the next puff.

French braids. This didn't last long. Her hair comes out easily so I have to redo it very often.

Flat twists on the top of her head. My first attempt.

Flat twists into puffs in the back.

More flat twists, but this time to the side.

My first try at a veil style. It is little pony tails that crisscross all the way on top of her head.

the back was two puffs and one set of a veil.

I love doing Fi's hair and I have to do it every few days and usually fix it everyday. Her hair is very curly but does not stay very long in anything no matter what I put it in.

I have a lot to learn and I have yet to make a good straight part on her head, but compared with how it was going 6 month ago we are make headway.

I am learning a lot from this new website that I found on another adoptive mom's blog: www.happygirlhair.com

Check it out, it is wonderful. A mom of Ethiopian twin girls talks all about how she styles their hair.

Grandparents visit

Sorry this post is so long in coming. Clark's parents came to visit a few weeks ago and the kids loved getting to see Grandma and Grandpa again. The picture above is the kids eating orange juice pops to kill the time before the Grandparents came.

There was lots of reading going on!

Grandma is a reading coach for the public schools in AL and the kids love to bring her book after book to read to them.

100 th Post and Re-adoption

I think this is my 100th post on this blog. I first started this blog when we started the adoption process for Fi and now we are a family of four. A few weeks ago we made that even more final by re-adopting her here in GA. She was already adopted in Ethiopia before we even went to get her and as soon as she was brought into the US with us she got a citizen card, but still only had an Ethiopian birth certificate and passport.

So a few months after getting home we contacted a lawyer and started the process to re-adopt her in our state. Our court date was a few weeks ago. The picture below is of us with the judge and our lawyer after making it official.

Our kids did not make this day in court easy. My Mom was suppose to go with us and help watch the kids but got really sick (we think it was a light case of swine flu) and Jessa was pretty sick from chemo and couldn't come either. So it was just me and Clark with the kids.

So at first the kids sat quiet and cute in their little Ethiopian outfits while we waited for our turn in court. But, that did not last long. By the time we got into the court room their short little toddler attention spans were long gone. I was reading a book to T when suddenly Fi was gone. She had dropped to her stomach and started crawling under the benches of course Tobin thought that looked like fun so while we were getting her back, he started to climb under as well.

Once it was our turn with the judge both kids were crying for me and trying to get into my lap as I was being sworn in. Finally we were done and as we were leaving the judge said with a smile "have fun" which really sounded like good luck. Clark said, "we already do".

How can two kids that are so cute be so much trouble? Look at those faces! I just want to kiss them. Though after our day in court, Clark and I never want to take them out in public again.

My Hot Mess

Little Fi (it is short for her Ethiopian name Fikrte) has now been home 7 months so I thought I would do a post just about her. We call her our Hot Mess, read on to find out why.

Bonding: It is finally really feeling like she has been here always. She has been very bonded to Clark and I (more so with me) for a few months now, but every month the bond gets deeper. She has learned to say "Mommy" finally (and very clearly) but now says it 50 times a day and usually 5 times in a row. Most of the time she just says it to see if I will answer back, I make sure that I do each time. She is very demanding about her needs (I think being an orphan made her quite the survivor) so they usually get met quickly or there is hell to pay. She still has to sleep right next to someone all night long and gets up if she wakes up and you are not there. She is also really shy and doesn't really warm up to many others besides her close family.

But, it is true it really does take a good 6 months to become a real family and be very well bonded. We felt like it had happened long before this, but now looking back I can see a difference.

Brother and Sister: She and T are getting along more and very bonded to each other. They cry if separated too long and love to hug and kiss each other good night. They are finally starting to really play a little bit and enjoy each others' company. I talk a lot to Tobin about how we are a family and we have to take care of each other and he has been helping "baby" more and the hitting is becoming less.

Ramblings: My only problem is that my kids like me too much and never really want to be away from me. My Mom always had the same problem. She nursed us til we were 2, had us in bed with her and dad, and home schooled us. We were with her all of the time and would even sit outside the bathroom door when she would try to take a bath. Now after we are all grown up she is still the one that we all talk to and we are all very close to my parents. Yet, all four of us have gone out of state to college and some even out of the country. All that bonding never created co-dependant kids, so I am not too worried about my two either. Kids really aren't meant to be away from their mothers much when they are young (throughout history that is).

The Hot Mess: My sister Jessica (who has been living at home while she is getting her chemo treatments for her cancer since March) calls Fi a Hot Mess and it is the perfect way to describe her. She is our little wonderful Hot Mess. If there is a puddle of mud, she sits in it; if there is any dirt/sand, she puts it into her hair; if something is not nailed down, she throws it; if an object is on the floor, she trips over it; if there is water, she pours it on herself. She is always covered in some type of grim, always making a mess, and falls over everything. Fi is either happy or a huge whinny mess. She often falls onto the ground during one of her whining fits. She is very extreme and dramatic. One time she walked by a glass of water at my parents' house and grabbed it, poured the whole thing over her head and kept on walking.

She is such a hoot and also so very exhausting. But, as all of you moms out there with your own little Hot Messes know, they are so much fun to parent and you wouldn't want them any other way (though hopefully she will grow out of some of her more messy behaviors).