A New Family of Four

Today marks three weeks since walking into that orphanage on the other side of the world and being handed a screaming one year old that was our new daughter. It feels like another life time ago and yet I know that we have a long way to go to bond as a family.

If no one minds, I am going to be very honest in my posts about my kids and the adoption. When we were going through the adoption process, I read tons of blogs of other families that were already home in hopes of getting to read the reality of adoption.

There was only a few who actually told it like it is.

So I am going to.

Adoption is the most wonderful process and experience! It almost rivals childbirth. I know that is crazy to say and while childbirth is magical and wonderful, it is even more amazing to travel to another country and be handed a one year old. It is beautiful when God puts together a family from around the world.

That being said adoption is hard, but totally worth it.

We are still adjusting and bonding. We love Fikrte already, but we have only known her for three weeks! It will take a lot longer to really be bonded to her like we are to Tobin. Sometimes it still feel like I am taking care of someone else's kid. I still don't know all of her little signs and sounds. But, I don't expect to.

Fikrte is bonding very well considering how short of time it has been. I still don't think she knows that we are her parents, she might still think that we will leave just like everyone has in her life. She still throws big fits (very much like a 1 year old) and throws herself on the ground and screams when she gets upset about something or doesn't get her way. She sleeps okay as long as she is sleeping next to someone. We have just let her do what she wants. Bonding is so much more important to us right now and sleeping right next to her is a great way to show her that we are not going to leave her. An adopted kid sometimes doesn't even know what a parent is.

The Siblings

It is the new siblings that are having the hardest time bonding. Tobin does a lot of pushing and throwing his own fits. He doesn't want her to touch anything and is always grabbing everything from her. It is partly his personality and a lot of his age. He seems to like her though and wants to be around her. She cries if he tries to touch her too much even if he is being nice. I don't blame her, she has gotten pushed over too many times by him.

Throwing pennies in the fountain with Daddy.

Jessa wishes she could throw pennies too.

Our first picture as a family of four.

We are very happy to have both of our kids with us now instead of just looking at her picture. It is still hard though and adjustment is coming slowly but steadily. I am okay with that though because bonding is a process not a moment in time. We love our little girl and I love getting to love her and Tobin more and more each day. And I can't wait to adopt again one day. Next time I want to adopt older boys (because they often don't get homes). I would adopt every few years if we had the money.